“It’s not like home here, my favorite chocolate bar is not for sale, vegetables are very tasteless, it’s so quiet everywhere, and my friends would understand the joke” – probably, we all miss our hometown and compare it with the place where we live now.
This is a normal reaction, especially if this is your first trip without your parents. You can be sure that I fully understand you! Homesickness is fine, but it can prevent you from enjoying studying abroad.
In this blog, I am going to share the most practical tips on what to do if you miss home and how not to fall into depression. Let’s go!
- Beat the homesickness!
When your brain has nothing to do, it looks for a way to amuse itself. What does it immediately start thinking about? Okay, to be honest, mine starts to think about food, but I guess yours is about the home. (even if it’s not true, just pretend that it is, please. Because today’s topic is homesickness. Thank you.) To prevent this from happening, be active: participate in different events (we have a lot of them!), go on excursions, explore the city on your own, communicate with your roommates and classmates.
You can start keeping a diary to remember every day of your journey. Who knows, maybe you have a talent for blogging! Homesickness can be your inspiration! Well, at least, this is what happened in my case. Mmm, yes, I still don’t have many followers, but that’s not the point!
- Meet new people
The people you meet can play an important role in your life. It’s always easy when you’re at school or traveling in a group. You know these people and can easily communicate with them. But you will never know what a relationship that goes beyond your comfort zone can result in.
Such meetings include your temporary traveling companions, roommates whom you did not know before, and so on. To learn something new and meet interesting people, get out of your comfort zone! I have a lot of international friends in Estonia, and it is always interesting to learn and understand different cultures, why people do things the way they do.
- Keep familiar things around
Having things from “home” can help you to deal with homesickness. For example, I decorated my room with family photos, Azerbaijani flags, magazines. I have a bracelet with coordinates of my hometown. All of these little details make me feel cozy and safe. But don’t be upset if you’re already in Estonia and don’t have any familiar items with you. Not everything has to be a physical object. In the age of the Internet, you may be able to stream your local TV channel or radio station, for example.
- Talk with your family and friends
Talking with my loved ones back home helps me feel supported and loved. My day is incomplete without talking to my mom. She’s my biggest fan and never fails to brighten up even the most horrid of days. I don’t call my dad every day, because he is not a huge fan of phone calls. But we talk at least 3 times a week. And my brother doesn’t like calls, that’s why we just text each other. Sometimes we do things I feel nostalgic about with my family. Tradition and rituals help me foster a sense of connectedness to home even when I’m far away.
I don’t talk to my friends every day, because we have a lot of homework. But I connect with them and see what they’re up to on social media. And once a month, we buy the same snacks, video call each other, and watch the same film together. Just like we used to do in Azerbaijan. I always feel very energetic and positive after these “movie days”.
- Find your favourite place
It may be a library, book shop, park or whatever you want. Everyone who knows me knows that my favorite place in Tartu is Werner cafe. I go there at least once a week. All the staff knows me there, they know my favorite dish, favorite drink, favorite cake. I am always welcome there. They are happy to see me, they ask me about my wellbeing, about my classes, they even sometimes text me via Instagram to inform me about the availability of my favorite cake. My Werner family helps me feel at home. And I am very grateful to them for making me feel loved. I highly recommend you to find your “home” away from home!
- Ask for help
During my first year, I was too shy to ask someone for help. I wanted to be independent and try to do everything on my own. I was thinking that I don’t need help. For me asking for help was a signal of weakness or failure in my character. But it was a huge mistake. Don’t make the same mistake. Our university has counseling services available, which you can use if you need them. You also can contact us, International Student Ambassadors! We provide support and guidance to everyone who wishes to learn more about UT. We share our experience of studying and living in Estonia. If you have any questions about study programs, courses, accommodation, residence permits, sports, and student life in general, feel free to contact us.
- Represent your country well
Remember, you are the ambassador of your own country. People often equate people’s personalities and behaviors with their cultural background and where they are from. Sometimes it can be stereotypical. But other times, it can be based on what they see and experience with their own eyes. People, especially locals, may never have or may never again meet someone from our culture, background, or nationality. They are often curious about us and want to learn more. We are the minority, a somewhat exotic anomaly, and often we are watched and observed. The other students will think that all people from our country behave the same way as we do. I think it is my responsibility to make a good impression and to represent my country well. I always try to make a good first impression. As a result, I have many people, students, locals, and people I’ve met along the way, who tell me that they would love to visit my country. They tell me that I help them feel more welcome, confident, and comfortable in doing so. At such moments, I understand that all the difficulties are worth something. Even though I am far from home, I always tell people about my country and culture. It means that I am here for a reason. This helps me deal with homesickness.
- Celebrate the anniversary
Homesickness is like breaking up with a loved one. First, you need to get over it, eat ice cream, a lot of chocolate, and chips, feel pity for yourself for a few days, but then you need to move on! If we treat a certain moment in life as a tragedy, our brain will automatically rebuild our emotional and psychological state according to these parameters. But what happens if we change the system? Try to make a holiday out of it. Sounds promising, right? For example, I moved to Estonia on October 22nd. I call this date the “Day of Missing Home”, which l devote to familiar things for me: native music, domestic cinema, and national food. But only for 24 hours!!! Then pick up a phone and ask your new friends if they fancy a coffee or treat yourself to delicious food with your student discount (because let’s be honest, everyone loves discounts).
It takes work and effort to get through homesickness. But once you remove the homesick glasses, you’ll be able to see everything around you in a new, positive light!
All pictures belong to the author.
